Friday, March 20, 2009

Cute and Amazing Cat Video

I saw this on Youtube. This is probably one of the cutest, funniest and most amazing cat video I have ever seen. :) LOL

Saturday, March 14, 2009

MUN for a Practicum

When I was taking up my course in International Studies, the Practicum or On-The-Job Training (OJT) that we had was Model United Nations (MUN). For those of you who might not know what MUN is, it a simulation of the United Nations conference organized by the UN itself, so that students can practice becoming state diplomats. Sounds awesome?
Well the glitter ends there. I really do not know why this should even be considered as an "OJT". I really cannot find any practicality in it.

Anyway, I will continue on.

After I graduated, whenever I applied to a company, the interviewer will always ask you about your OJT experience (like all other fresh graduates). Whenever I tell them about my practicum, I always see my interviewer suppressing a slight laughter. There was even one interviewer who did not know what MUN is and when I explained to him what it was, I just cannot forget the look on his face afterward. He smiled at me with his eyes full of pity and disbelief. I can still remember his reaction up to this day. I remember that the job I was applying for at that time was an admin assistant that deals with office type work.

The look on his face can be for the following reasons:

1. I am applying for a corporate job. My course was totally unrelated to business and my chances of getting into the corporate world is slim.

2. And then, my practicum was MUN. How is that going to help me in my job in the future should I end up working as a admin assistant? How pitiful.

3. The only job available to you might be for foreign affairs or government jobs. But how many openings are there for government jobs and how many people pass the Foreign Service Exam out of the multitude of IS graduates and takers out there.

Oh God, I can only say that MUN as a practicum is so totally far fetched from the reality out there. You are already being trained as a diplomat, when there is hardly even a job opening for a diplomat for fresh graduates. International Studies as a course is too idealistic, impractical and unrealistic. Granted, that a few of my college mates ended up working for an embassy. Most of them ended up working there for only months. But how stable of a job is that? How many embassies are actually offering regularization to new employees. In fact, how many embassies out there actually have job openings?

You know what the saddest part is? The saddest part is that MUN is held in the United States and that you have to pay for it just to participate in it. The school did not give any financial support to the students. All the expenses, from the airfare, to the hotel accomodation up to the fee for the conference itself are all shouldered by the students and their parents. Isn't OJT or Practicum supposed to earn you some money? In the end, the IS students ended up expending tons of money for a practicum that will not even be useful for their careers in the end. How sad... I want to cry.

Monday, March 9, 2009

I remember my mother series: 2. My very first traumatic experience.

I was watching a segment on Bebe GandangHari (formerly Rustom Padilla) on a TV show recently. There he gave details on his very first traumatic experience as a child, and how that experience stuck to his head and affected the way he is while growing up. He told the interviewer that he was only 3 years old at that time and he suffered physical violence at the hands of his father. His mother then just allowed his father to beat him. He was so young and yet he still remembers it vividly.

OMG. I can totally relate to this. I also had my very first traumatic experience with my mother while I was around that age like BB. This experience I still so remember vividly.

I remember I was being scolded by my mother because I could not write the letter X properly in my name. (pauses to hold back the tears...). I tried my best, but I still cannot get my writing to be correct.
Then she started to shout and yell at me. She was holding my hands while I was writing. She started writhing and squeezing my hand. I was in pain. She started cursing me, like (p*t*ng ina mo... and other obscenities.) I was just 3 years old.

I remember I cried. But this only made her more furious. (pauses to hold back the tears...). She took a leather belt, and then she started whipping me with it. She said that if I cry, she will whip me more. Tears just flow from my eyes. I could not help it. She started whipping me harder. It was painful. I had rashes in my legs and back after that. I was only 3 years old. I remember my father being there behind us all that time. He was just observing what was happening. While being whipped by my mother, I looked at him and my eyes pleaded for help. My mother got angrier. She whipped me harder. My father just nodded at me as if he was silently approving of my mother's violence. I did not even get help from him. He just sat there and did nothing. I was traumatized. (pauses to let the tears fall). I was still trying my best to write the letter X on paper. At every mistake, I get a whip lash from the leather belt. I hear more curses. Tears get to fall from my eyes uncontrollably. And then, the whip lash gets harder. I mustered all my strength there to hold back the tears. No one was there to help me. No one was there to feel for me.

After what seemed like forever, I finally got to write my name correctly on paper. The cursing stopped. The whipping stopped. But I did not get any congratulations or any sort of affection for my effort. I never felt my mother regretted hurting me. I was still crying at that time. But I was crying from the inside. From then onwards, I had a very different view of my mother and my father. I became scared to cry even when I have to. Things will never be the same for me again.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Chris Crocker's new song: Fell for the Enemy

I cannot get enough of this song - "Fell for the Enemy".



This is such a beautiful ballad. And the most interesting part of it is that it came from someone you would never expect to create something like this - Chris Crocker. :)

Friday, March 6, 2009

I remember my mother series: 1. Horrible Memories of my Mother

When I think of my mother, only bad things come to my mind. I cannot even begin to describe the horror. I do not even know where to begin my story... But with this blog, I may be able to put down the things that haunt me... This is a series that will list down some of the events associated with my mother... Needless to say, I do not like her. I do not love her. She is sadistic. More to come...